Want to change the world? That means you’ll have to speak out about what changes you want to make. Does this thought terrify you and make you feel like all your personal convictions are actually not that important? That’s pretty normal. In fact, I used to feel like that too. Actually, sometimes I still do. My sweaty palms and trembling quivers are meant to sound like words. When people would say problematic things to me, I remember finding it hard to say “Hey, that’s pretty racist” or “Don’t speak to me like that”. However, now I’m more confident about my ideas and sharing them with others. Here are some of my own experiences and advice to help you change the world… one breath at a time.
This sounds like a silly tip, but don’t forget to breathe. I learned that if you intentionally focus on your breath, you can reconnect with yourself and your emotions, no matter what situation you’re in. Just before I read poetry in front of an audience that included a large number of people I admire, I freaked out and had a panic attack. Unfortunately, it was in a room on the bottom floor of what otherwise was a lovely restaurant so it meant climbing a lot of stairs to get somewhere I felt that I could breathe. My mum was there with me and she helped me to remember to breathe. I took 10 deep breaths, focused on five things around the room and was ready to go on. It was at an event for mental health, the London Sad Girls Club event, so when I was crying at the top of the stairs I didn’t really feel any shame. An important part about being able to overcome your fears and being able to speak for yourself is knowing that you have people that will support you and your ideas. Many people that walked past me gave me words of encouragement and support. I managed to read in front of an audience of about fifty and I think I did pretty well.
Of course, it’s okay when you are not able to do this. Sometimes it’s difficult to process your thoughts and get them out how you want to. I’m normally the confident group speaker in class but I remember once when I was having a bad week, I could not get my point across at all. Everything I said came out wrong, completely different from how I thought of it in my mind. At the time I was embarrassed, but in hindsight, I realised that it’s okay to not be able to win every battle with yourself.
As an activist, it’s important to put yourself first and remember that you can pick your battles. Someone once told me, “You can’t help fix others if you’re broken” and that spoke to me. I cannot be there for others if I’m not taking care of myself. It’s important to remember that it’s perfectly okay to take a break. Log off of social media and give yourself time to process current events. Give yourself time to be angry or grieve outside of the eyes of social media. Give yourself space. Because periods of self-reflection and care-taking will make you stronger, more equipped, and confident to speak out about how you feel.
No matter on what scale you do it, speaking out is hard. You have to be ready to be met with negative reactions, or have people misunderstand you or have people use your words against you. On the other hand, you will find people that will agree with your thoughts and ideas and be ready to have open-minded conversations. Those are the conversations and people that will make any backlash or difficulty worth it. Being able to share your voice is powerful and liberating—even if you might not know exactly what you’re talking about. Mistakes are the foundation of growth. Bring up political issues at the dinner table, shout out of your bedroom window (with consideration!), and share your thoughts and passions with the world. But before you do, just remember to breathe.
