If you are under the age of 25, you’ve probably heard of the “Call Her Daddy” podcast. Since 2018, over 300,000 listeners have tuned into the sex and relationship show every Wednesday. The show has a large cult following, one that saved host Alexandra Cooper’s career when her sidekick Sophia Franklyn left the show in early 2020. In the episodes, the girls (Cooper is the sole host now) recount their hookup stories and embarrassing moments to empower other young women when it comes to relationships.
The “Call Her Daddy” conversations are so honest it might feel like you’re catching up with your friends over breakfast about the night before. The podcast was founded on the idea that women should feel just as empowered during sex as their hetero-male partners. While the hosts do shine a spotlight on self-love (like masturbation, receiving oral sex, and sex toys), their relationship advice is super, super focused on pleasing a male partner.
While “Call Her Daddy” does a great job of talking about the funny and embarrassing side of relationships that are often untouched by mainstream media, the delivery is often misguided. In an episode called “Stop Ruining Your Relationship,” Cooper and Franklyn reveal the tactics they use to make their partners jealous, whether he’s labeled a “boyfriend” or someone they just met out at a bar. Cooper shared a story about the time she set alarms that sounded like her ringtone on her phone so she could convince her boyfriend she was getting calls from another guy in the middle of the night.
“What I did with that guy specifically, is because I was feeling insecure. I felt like he had the upper hand in the relationship,” said Cooper. “The thing is Sofia, those weren’t calls. Those were my alarms that I had personally set for myself. I would change my alarm tone to make it my ringtone…I’m a psycho bitch pretending someone is f**king calling me.”
Other advice they give includes telling girls to wear cologne so they can upset their boyfriends by coming home smelling like another guy. They promote creating fake social media accounts to stalk your love interest and those he or she is involved with. They often give tips on how to catch a cheater as well as how to get away with cheating. “Cheat or be cheated on” is one of their many mantras.
Even Franklyn knows this behavior is destructive: “That’s just the most f**ked up dynamic ever,” she says on the episode.
Relationships should empower both parties. If you aren’t feeling confident in your relationship, you should not resort to manipulation tactics to bring the other person down to your level. Communication is key in any relationship––platonic or romantic––and the tips and tricks the “Call Her Daddy” hosts give to their fans conflate having power in a relationship with being controlling and devious. In “Professional Athletes,” the young women talk about how girls should make their boyfriend jealous by flirting with other guys in front of them.
“I would f**k with the guy I was dating,” said Cooper on the “Professional Athletes” episode. In college, she would challenge other guys to a beer chugging contest or ask another man to be her beer pong partner while out with her boyfriend to make him jealous. They tell their listeners to “disappear for a little bit,” or to bring up your ex so that the guy you’re with knows that you’re wanted by other men.
Whether the hosts of “Call Her Daddy” aim to advise or entertain their listeners, fans should take their advice on the modern dating world with a grain of salt. No healthy relationship can exist if it’s tainted with lies, jealousy, and manipulation. More times often than not, using this type of dating advice can backfire, putting your partner off more than it will turn them on.
For a woman to feel empowered in a relationship with a man, she should not resort to the conniving tactics Cooper and Franklyn share on their wildly popular podcast. Instead, take notes from other dating podcasts, such as “Guys We F***ked” by Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson, “Black Girl Experience,” by Jasmine Danielle, or “Take Me Out” by Tiff Baira, and stick to “Call Her Daddy” for your entertainment needs.
Not all men are interested in women for sex, and not all women enter the dating game merely to find a spouse. The modern dating world can be hard to navigate, but once you state your wants and needs in a relationship, you’ll feel more confident than ever in your romantic relationships.
